The Most Serious Poem I've Ever Written, Poem 17

Romance Novel

Buck Chesterwood III is a lonely billionaire.
He feels his life is as cold as space.
All his money piled in a rotisserie pyre,
with naked supermodels tending it
couldn’t warm this heart iceberg,
swimming in his inside blood sea.

When he’s wearing a shirt (almost never)
he pilots his plane to the mountains he owns,
considering making a big greasy Buck Chesterwood smear.
But even death, which he braves daily
in his no-holds cage matches
with the world’s greatest martial artists,
offers him no foreseeable respite from Drearytown.

Until one day,
from the no-carbon-footprint helicopter he designed,
he sees Lily Hart, clutching a cliff’s edge
half-way down the northwest side of one of his private mountains.
Below her, the Ocean of Sharp Jagged Rocks
where ships a-plenty have met their skewery fate.
Above her, ten mountain lions stalk towards her
perfect, piano virtuoso, hand model worthy, even pretty when they’re clutchy, fingers.

Lord Chesterwood immediately falls the most in love with her ever.
Seeing her distress Buck never hesitates,
he’s never even heard the word.
He sends his helicopter careening into the lion herd,
leaps from the cockpit, shooting between the blades,
and catches Lily just as she falls.
He times their 250 foot dive perfectly,
even so their clothes are ripped from their bodies
and they paddle inches from each other,
in the cold erotica of a 50 degree sea.

After Buck fights off two sharks
by diving into their gullets and ripping them in half,
they get back to his castle he had flown stone by stone from Prague
to the continent he discovered in the Bermuda Triangle.
Buck and Lily get married, because he’s a real stand-up guy
and Lily digs commitment and cares nothing for money.
Which is good because Buck gives it all to Darfur,
except for what he gets for the Nobel Peace Prize
which he spends on a yacht that they sail on endlessly.