I’ve Never Written You a Love Poem
How about:
this morning under the cirrus strained light,
in between the skrees of our rude electric bird
when you gripped into me,
to thread us, lead us heavier
back down into the sinkmud of sleep,
our learned bends and jointures
burrowing us down past beds and floors,
squirming us into the deep loam
where the cicadas cyst,
past root works and dog forgotten bones,
and under-rivers and oil seas,
into the shared inner world we only know…
could be why I love you but—
the ritual way you hollow out every baked spud,
twisting the tines like a drill bit
until the white soils of the potato let go
into a hill you sweep together for later
sliver of butter and flurry of salt,
and then move to the two halved skins,
which now look like a severed deflated football
massacred in a game played by scissors or lobsters,
and how the whole time you ‘ow’ and ‘oh’
at the heat of your surgery patient
and then nibble that salted epidermis like
you’re holding an edible playing card…
is so something I never tire of it.
I don't think it's sappy. It's really quite good. The first stanza especially is gorgeous.
ReplyDeleteIs this the first love poem you've written? You should write more. Hey, aren't you a big Neruda fan?
I agree with stubb. Hardly sappy. Your fascination and amusement is so palpably captured. And isn't that what keeps any relationship in the "worth-it" category? This is a really fun piece.
ReplyDeleteI never have written Valerie a love poem which is something she used to bring up from time to time. I'm like the carpenter who outfits everyone else with beautiful cabinets and yet neglects his own house.
ReplyDeleteYes, I am a fan of Neruda and I've just always felt I'm too concerned with clarity to pull off his heartspins and dragonwords.
Bonnie,
Thank you. It's funny what things I'm okay with revealing and what I'm not. And I never did thank you for your very nice compliment on my Kittinger poem. You've always been a big fan of my work. That means a lot to me.
You continue to treat me. I just came in from a weeding and watering session, got scared out of my wrinkled skin by Stubb's post, and then sent to enchantment by your love poem. Your wife should be basking about now.
ReplyDeleteI made my first voyage to wikipedia at your suggestion. Thank you for increasing my reservoir of knowledge. (By the way, Palisades Reservoir is at 1.8 percent capacity.
Norris
POW.
ReplyDeletejimmy, you are exploding with good product these days.
I almost got a whiff of Garcia Lorca in there..tuned down a bit, of course. The scissors/lobsters imagery did it for me.
Sinkmud of sleep... I don't think I'll ever pull my wife back into bed on a lazy Saturday morning ever again without thinking of that line.
ReplyDeleteWell, thank you, Mrs. Norris. As soon as I'm done helping our friends move I have two more poems to post. Jaren's story was pretty awesome though. Even though it made my skin cutting aversion prickle. I'm glad you looked up the imagism link. I'm studying the imagists and the New York School of Poets. (I'll post why I'm studying the latter at a later date. Though it doesn't sound interesting, it is a funny story.)
ReplyDeleteI have been reading Lorca and Neruda lately. It's funny who I need at certain times. I'm glad you liked it. The absurd images of lobsters playing football makes me laugh.
Steven,
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you dug "sinkmud". I'm very interested in using pedestrian language and linking it or reinventing it just enough to make it fresh. Not all my experiments work. I want to read some of your new stuff. When you going to send it to me?
That is one I'd keep folded in my own personal journal to pull out and read when ever you ticked me off, so I could remember there was a reason I kept you around. Ha.
ReplyDeleteIn all seriousness, It's beautiful.
Shame on you for taking so long to write one! *I am shaking my finger at you, on the off chance you are wondering.* :-p