DIANA IS DRUNK IN THE AIR TRAFFIC CONTROL TOWER AGAIN
“Hey, Northwest 1015, you’re flying in pretty gay right
now.”
“Don’t call yourself a pilot when you’re just a co-pilot,
Walter.”
“Good landing, Pilot.
Maybe next time leave the rubber on the wheels. Zing!”
“I’m mooning you right now.
That’s right. Butt flesh on the big window. Towards you.”
“That’s a sexy voice there, Pilot. Do you have a wife? In this state?”
“I’m not saying I want to see an airplane crash, I’m just
saying statistically I should probably see at least one before I go to the big
terminal in the sky.”
“Oh, look at me, I’m Jetblue. I’m like the unjaded teenager of the airline
world. Wait until you hit US Airways’s
age and then you tell me great your so called humanity is.”
“Oh, why don’t you cry about runway wait some more? Maybe your tears will float you to San Fran.”
“Delta 425, why don’t you circle one more time and think
about your attitude.”
“Wendy, you’re a lady, right? Taking the skies back from the
men. Good job, sister. Let me buy you a
drink. Come on. We air broads got to
stick together.”
“LaGuardia? Honey, this is Logan. You’re way off course. Oh man, are you
screwed…I’m just joshing ya! Welcome to New York, sucker.”
“You’re cleared for landing on my futon tonight, Captain.”
“You don’t like my landing rules, Captain Sauerkraut, you
can turn around and go back to Naziland!”
“No me speekee Eenglesh, Mista Air Bird. No me undeestander “landing gear broken, need
emergency landing.”
