Things People Never Say On Friday At Work (I Hope)

It’s Friday! Let’s strip down to our undies and wrassle!

End of the week, baby!  Let’s burn down a Planned Parenthood!

It’s Weekend Eve!  My life is a lie.  Don’t slip on my tears on the way out!

Holy Friday, Batman!  Who wants to stick their hand in my open surgery wound?!

Friday! Friday!  Let’s! Join! Con-! vents!

It’s Monday somewhere in the world! (It actually never is.)

Friday?!  Time doesn’t even exist, you Neanderthals!  Time is irrelevant!

Friday?  Oh my gosh, I left my kid at daycare on Tuesday!

It’s Friday!  Let’s give our paychecks to street ladies!

Friday, already?!  I was having so much fun at work I didn’t even notice the day all week because I’m sooo dedicated to my job.  No! Don’t make me go home!  I want to sleep here!  This is my life!

Friday is Bye-Day!

Friday is Guy-Day!

Friday is Die-Day! (I hope this never happens.)

Friday is Princess Di Day!  That’s why I, a thick burly man, will be dressed as Princess Di every Friday from now until my fire-ment.

Friiiiiiidaaaaaaay!  I’m going to start up a heroin habit!

TGIF!  Let’s talk in acronyms!

TGIF!  Who knows what that means?  I seriously cannot crack the code.

Hold on, it’s Friday?  The world is ending tonight! I forgot to tell everybody. Nuts and nuts!

End of the workweek!  And beginning of the blurkbleek! Beep bop! I’m a robot.  I’m a robo-beep-bop-boop.

Friday!  What is friday?  Is good? Is snack in face?

It's Fridaaaaaaaaaay!  Ilikecowsandiwishicouldmarrythembecause imarealsickweirdohaveagoodweekendgoodbyeimgoingtogosmoochcowswhiletheysleepbye.

It's Thursday!  Shut up, you liars!  It's Thursday and you know it!  I will punch anyone who disagrees! I control time!  I control it!