Tuesday, May 07, 2013

BEST BLOCKBUSTER SUMMER EVER? or How I Set Myself Up For Hulk Sized Disappointment But Can't Help Myself

I think it’s healthy to be excited about things.  It makes life more topographical.  No matter what I’m doing, I can see a mountain in the distance.  That mountain can be a lot of things.  The new Marvel movie.  A festival or journal I submitted to.  A trip.  A new burger place.  A project being filmed or staged.  Whatever it is, I like knowing it’s coming.  Feeling its nearness.  It’s like driving off-road.  Steering for the peaks and valleys instead of keeping to the even road.

Admittedly, it sets you up for greater disappointment. Anyone who has owned a BMX bike knows there are painful possibilities from going off the jump.  In layman’s terms, it’s called “crotching” yourself.  This analogy is apt because a good crotching is not life altering or damaging.  It’s just a momentary incapacitation, a discomfort you wish would pass so you can get back on the bike.  It also is obvious to everyone else around but it’s not a wound that can be treated like an arm break.  It’s treated with sympathy mixed with “I Told You So”.

Life is easily crotchable.  Especially if you set yourself up for it.  You don’t have to build jumps.  Most people don’t.

There are definitely larger applications for this but I’m going to use my love of blockbusters. In the Spring, I map out my Summer.  Not by vacations and swimming  but by which movies I’m most excited about.  I love Blockbuster Summer.  It’s a mountain I watch on the horizon, a mountain full of superheroes and face punches and car chases and witty banter and space battles and me stuffing my face with candy and Coke.

The success of Blockbuster Summer depends on these factors:

1.     The Amount of Blockbusters I’m Excited About
2.     The Amount That End Up Being Great
3.     The Amount That End Up Being Just Okay
4.     The Amount That Make Me Want to Die By Drinking Lava

It’s not all blockbusters.  It’s just the ones I want to see.  In 2011 there were 6 and it ended up 5/6.  In 2012, it was 3/4.  This year there are 7.  And about 5 Maybes.  It could be the Best Blockbuster Summer Ever.

Now uttering those words has put me in a dangerous, imminently crotching place.  But I have to live like this.  I have to be excited.  I have to share my excitement.  I have to find like-minded excitable people.

So when I say it can be likened to movies, it can.  But it's really more of a philosophy for me.  A choice to live life out in the open with hopes and dreams sewed on my sleeves.  Did you know I'm writing a new script? Of course you did.  I told you that.  Did you know that I'm waiting to hear back on a few other writing projects?  Sure.  Because I have to tell you.  It keeps me boiling.  It keeps a horizon in my eyes.

I’d rather be disappointed than regret.  I’d rather wallow in all my failures then obsess in my thoughts over might-have-beens.  And it’s not fame and recognition I want.  It’s completion.  It’s creation.  It’s standing over the sandcastle I’ve built and being okay that we may not outlive each other.  But at least everything I’ve made is here now.  I don’t care about immortality.  I care about the quality of my mortality.

See?  It’s a much bigger issue.  It’s not just me obsessing over Iron Man’s 42 suits of armor.   That’s a part of it, though.

For those of you interested, here's my Blockbuster Summer List:
Iron Man 3
The Great Gatsby
Star Trek: Into Darkness
Man of Steel
Pacific Rim
The Wolverine