Another Sketch

Christian Busath created this character, Jimmy Ripple, during our days together in Comic Frenzy. Jimmy is an overweight cub scout who has some serious food gorging problems and a great deal of naivete. Christian will be back in New York, rehearsing for his role in the touring company of The 42nd Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee and we're going to go perform this at the Upright Citizen's Brigade. One of these days I need to figure out why I like to place innocent characters in the way of discovering large and sometimes awful truth. Here's an excerpt.

Jimmy Ripple Goes Camping

(Scoutmaster Dave comes onstage and pulls out his map.
He looks back towards the way he came. Jimmy Ripple
comes onstage, huffing from overexertion.)

Jimmy
Scoutmaster Dave! Wait for me. I’m here.

Dave
Listen, you gotta keep up on this hike, Timmy, or…

Jimmy
It’s Jimmy, Scoutmaster Dave. Jimmy Ripple. That’s what I call myself cuz that’s what my momma called me.

Dave
Sorry. Jimmy. We’ve got to make the ridge before sundown or else…

Jimmy
My momma died. From the birth. That’s what my grandma said.

Dave
Oh. I’m sorry, Jimmy. When we get to camp, we should talk about it. So, let’s head up this way…

Jimmy
Scoutmaster Dave, what’s a D-Tection?

Dave
What’s detection? You mean like the definition?

Jimmy
My momma had one when I was born. A D-Tection.

Dave
Oh, you mean a C-Section. That’s when there are complications or the baby’s too big so the doctors have to make an incision on the belly to get the baby.

Jimmy
(horrified) They cut my momma?

Dave
No, Jimmy. Well, yeah. But there must have been a reason.

Jimmy
I was super big. I set a world record for babies.

Dave
See? And now you’re a big cub scout, Jimmy.

Jimmy
I was seventeen pounds.

Dave
Holy Hell!

Jimmy
My grandma said I looked like a bowling bag covered in blood.

Dave
Oh, that’s awful.

Sketchy

I've been working on some projects besides my thesis. A couple of essays, a spec script, but mostly some sketches. There's an open sketch night at Upright Citizen's Brigade that Val and I and some friends are going to participate in. These are just some excerpts from a few I've been working on.


The Hardy Boys and the Time of the Month


(Joe Hardy is looking up, squinting towards something above his head. Frank Hardy runs in.)

Frank
Joe Hardy! You crazy Injun! Aunt Gertrude will have our hides for this!

Joe
Pipe down, Frank. We’re here on detective business.

Frank
Yeah, geez, Joe. That note you left sure was cryptic. I really bent my noodle on that one!

Joe
Golly, Frank, hold your flapper. You wanna blow this, Mr. Loudski? Now didja bring the binoculars?

Frank
Yeah. (searching his bag) Yeah, I’ve got them. Why don’t you check my keister for them? Take a good look up there…

Joe
Are you saying something?

Frank
Just crime fighting stuff…Cup of Joe, Joe Joe Bees…here it is!

(hands him the binoculars)

Joe
Swell. That’s what I needed.

Frank
So why are we outside Nancy Drew’s window? Is she going to help us solve the mystery?

Joe
No, Frank. She is the mystery.

Frank
Nancy? Jeepers, I can’t believe it. Is she a pirate? I bet she’s a pirate.


Joe
No, Frank, listen…

Frank
Or a jewel thief? Or a foreign spy? I’ve always thought she was queer, you know? Always wearing those mock turtlenecks and never going all the way and all that?

Joe
Dry up, Frank! She’s not a spy. Exactly. Golly, how do I say this? She’s a foreign something alright, cuz she’s a girl.

Frank
Has she got hidden loot? Like in a cave?

Joe
Sheesh. You’re making me blush, dum-dum. No, listen, Nancy gave me the brush off yesterday. We’ve been necking up and down Bayport and suddenly she doesn’t want it. Just like that. Then I hear some clue from her maid. Something called The Time of the Month. That’s what we’re here to solve.